Where would I be?

Among all others, I couldn't figure her out. She had a friendly smile with an intimidating atmosphere around her. Apart from her small and almost weightless bag and a phone that never leaves her hand, I couldn't find one thing in common that would lead me befriending this woman. But perhaps it is that caprice that led me to notice her in the first place.

Days had passed and I have pursued my interest to meet this lady. I wasn't so smart to not avoid her but I wasn't too timid to ignore her either.  With a rushed up script of pick-up lines, I tried to suave my way into friendship. And just like that,  so it began the stage of acquaintance.

My new friend, lady and me: we did everything together. We were partners in every activity - assignments, group works, pair works, you name it. I wasn't always fair with the responsibilities. In fact, looking back now, I would wonder if I ever was fair at all.

Even if we did have that mutual foundation of respect, I would always wind up making her do the dirty work. When it came to experiments, I would always turn to her to fix the settings in the microscope, write the data, and all the other things that no one wants to do. I was stubborn and lazy, but in spit that, I would always find her standing by my side.

Of course, all things didn't go well forever.

Sooner or later, we had to start a fight. Small bickers were sprouting from every end of our friendship's castle. Not all fights had a happy ending and not all fight were the same. Even when it came to our feuds and mishaps, I always find it funny how we can "diversify" the type of bicker that we were having. Note-planting, chair-moving, and many types of abuse that we can inflict to each other, we tried. In the end, small fights were always cured with a simple apology.

Not all fights were that easy to let go though. When real war would set between me and her which most of the time is my fault, we often need intersessions. On one cold war that we had, about financial affairs, I had to rely on her sister and mom to get me back on track with our relationship. Needless to say, the relentless plea and countless apologies always seem to get her back to the mood.

I have a patient friend. She knows I'm no good and she knows it takes time for me to learn some manners; but the second chances with this woman do not seem to have account.

On the first cold war that we had, I remember her saying "I can always forgive but I cannot forget".

At the end of the day, the bittersweet words and the threatening gestures would always be ended with a smile. As always, it was her pardon that I would seek.

About two years went by. I and my friend started another fight. This one was just reckless as I never know when to shut up.

Regardless of the reason for our feud, I was mostly shock by the cause of our reconciliation. For a reason far beyond my control, my friend would be leaving soon without the assurance of coming back to our school. She thought it would be best to set aside needless battles and treasure small moments as it occurs.

With every project we did, I grew bolder and more persistent; after every fights and misunderstandings that we had, I became wiser and more humble. I wasn't supposed to change this much. These facts were lingering in my mind.

As I stood there listening to her words of farewell, my heart pounded my chest and my  eyes felt a tear that if not carefully held would recklessly flow down my cheeks. Only days are left before she leaves and might not return.

As I look back on the things we did together and how I was before I met her. It makes me wonder: Where would I be in my life if I had not met her?